3 eye-opening facts about alcohol + mental health

3 eye-opening facts about alcohol + mental health

Let me start this one off by telling you that I miiiiight have had my first drink in high school (sorry, mom!), which was followed closely by my binge-drinking days in college (not as sorry, mom!). I had the cutest, most delicious mimosa bar at my bridal shower last weekend, and heck YES I love me a good glass of wine or a crisp Tito’s + soda + lime.

Needless to say, I enjoy having a drink or two, especially in social settings. But I also know the effects alcohol has on me, which is something I’ve learned through plenty of trial-and-error.

Rewind to my late-high school and early college years … I would wake up most Saturday mornings with a headache, nauseous as all get out, and with what I would eventually learn was crippling anxiety. I worked through the misery by trying my best to sleep in, taking a long shower and carb-loading on bagels or a burger + fries (speaking of, I could really go for a burger right now …). And after all of that, it was almost time to go out again. Fun, right?! Oh, college.

As I matured and my responsibilities grew, those drinking habits and lifestyle dwindled. But when I did decide to go out and drink a decent amount, I was noticing that I’d wake up the next morning in straight-up panic mode.

My chest felt like one giant knot, and thoughts such as “did I say anything stupid last night?” and “dear God, I hope I didn’t embarrass myself or my friends” raced through my mind so fast that no matter how late I stayed up the night before, I could never sleep in. These anxiety-ridden mornings lasted throughout the entire day. It was miserable.

I’m sure you’re able to guess, but this didn’t exactly make my anxiety any better … It made it worse – much worse. Actually, now that I think about it, this was when I started having regular panic attacks.

But why? Did everyone feel this crappy after a night out? I started to dig a little deeper through my bff Google, and ask both my doctor and my therapist questions during my visits. I learned a lot in a short time, but the following three pieces of information completely changed my drinking habits and my quality of life for the better.

  1. Alcohol is a depressant. This may not be news to some of you, but I honestly had no clue that alcohol is classified as a depressant until I looked into it. Logically, I thought “I drink to relax, to loosen up and to have some fun … So, how could alcohol be a depressant?”  Well, while drinking alcohol may initially have that energizing, “upper” effect for some, that feeling will not last. In fact, the effects of alcohol can actually include increased anxiety and stress, specifically. Yikes.
  2. Alcohol depletes the serotonin levels in the brain. This tidbit of information blew my mind (literally). As a depressant, alcohol lowers levels of serotonin (our “happiness” hormone). Considering I take an antidepressant to increase the levels of serotonin in my brain, drinking heavily was clearly counteracting that. (I take an SSRI, which stands for Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors. More on that here.) Basically, for me, excess alcohol + Generalized Anxiety Disorder = worse Generalized Anxiety Disorder.
  3. Alcohol messes up your sleep cycle. And we allllll know what it’s like when we don’t get enough sleep … It’s just not good. I used to think that passing out after a night of drinking meant that I slept hard, but boy was I wrong! A study revealed that drinking alcohol actually disrupts your body’s sleep homeostasis, or sleep regulator.

After typing this information out, I’m sure that many of you knew of these effects of alcohol … But, maybe you didn’t know or consider how it may affect your mood, your emotional state and/or your overall mental health.

I know that these three facts completely changed my outlook on alcohol and my drinking habits as an anxiety-prone gal.

Knowing all of this, I’m still all about balance and truly enjoy a tasty alcoholic beverage. So, in order to keep my mental health in check, I keep my drinking during the week minimal (if any), and indulge a little more on special occasions and at social events. And yes, I am DEFINITELY having some champagne at my wedding. Cheers, friends!



Please note that I am not a mental health professional. Always seek the advice of your mental health professional or other qualified health provider with any questions or concerns you may have regarding your condition.

the 4 positive attributes I can thank anxiety for

the 4 positive attributes I can thank anxiety for

Anxiety has a bad rap. It’s time to take a look at the other side of it.

Let’s face it: just the word “anxiety” has a negative connotation. Mental health disorders such as anxiety, depression and agoraphobia are tied to undesirable feelings like worry, sadness and fear.

Negative, negative, negative.

When my breath shortens before a presentation, when I wake up in the middle of the night with a painfully tight chest, or when I’m white-knuckled driving in bumper-to-bumper traffic, it’s hard to feel anything else but like utter shit.

But when I take a moment to reflect on these emotional patterns I experience daily, there’s a big part of me that is actually grateful for my anxiety and panic.

Yes, really.

Besides the fact that it makes me me (Type-A worrywart and all), I’ve learned that not everything that comes with anxiety is bad. Some things are good – like really, really good.

1. Academic + professional successes

Rather than only being considered a burden, anxiety may actually help you feel more motivated and prepared when faced with challenges. Research shows that students and athletes with some level of anxiety displayed improved performance on tests or while participating in competitive sports. Throughout school, I was always a straight-A student, which allowed me to get into the college of my dreams (Go Gators!). This lead to scoring some pretty amazing jobs so far in my career, including my current role in marketing.

Now, my anxiety wasn’t the only reason for the above-mentioned successes. I work my butt off day-in and day-out and have been blessed with an amazing support system … but, my anxiety wouldn’t allow me to fail in school or at work. I feel the need to be prepared in order to perform well in most situations. This is probably a trait of being a little bit of a perfectionist, too (which is not always a good thing!), but I’m truly grateful for how it has helped me get to where I am today.

2. Increased self-awareness

Ten years ago, I started going to therapy to help me understand my anxious feelings and daily panic attacks, and to this day, I’m still going strong. I’m a firm believer in the positive impact of therapy (more on that here), but my biggest takeaway from going? The increase in my self-awareness.

What situations trigger me into a downward spiral of stress and worry? How do I cope with tragedy? Is my anxiety affecting others? Therapy has helped me answer all of these questions and allowed me to mature, understand and love myself in ways I never knew were possible. Would I have ever gone to therapy if I didn’t face mental health struggles in college? Who knows.

3. Empathy and compassion

Anxiety is all-too common, and it seems especially so for my generation. In fact, a 2018 study revealed that millennials are by and large the most anxious generation. Some of my closest friends and family members have suffered from a mental health disorder. For anyone who has had to overcome these struggles, you know it’s not easy to talk about with others.

My mental health journey of learning and overcoming Generalized Anxiety and Panic Disorder has allowed me to understand what others have gone or are going through. It allows me to see the other side of things and dig deeper into why certain people react in certain ways. I am so, so grateful to have found an all-new level of empathy and compassion.

4. The passion to help others

I love writing. I love this blog. I love sharing my thoughts, experiences and the lesson I’ve learned. A couple of weeks ago, it really hit me that my message is resonating with others when one of my images went viral on Facebook (it has over 200K shares!).

Quote by Cheryl Richardson

When starting adventures & anxiety, my goal was to help, inspire and be there for at least one other … And without living through my own struggles, I would never be able to share my story, relate to others and live my dream.

It can be so easy to only see the negative side of having a mental health disorder. But if you dig deep, I’m sure you can see and embrace the positives, too!



Please note that I am not a mental health professional. Always seek the advice of your mental health professional or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your condition.

how to navigate anxiety in your relationship

how to navigate anxiety in your relationship

getting intimate with the role anxiety plays in relationships

Anxiety has a way of finding its way into everything –relationships included. This not only affects the person who lives with an anxiety disorder, but their significant other, too.

Some common relationship woes for those who struggle with anxiety include feeling dependent (*girl-raising-hand emoji*), overreacting to certain situations, letting insecurity takeover, and feeling fearful or defensive all too often. [1]

As a soon-to-be bride (March 2019, I see you!), navigating my anxiety disorders in my current relationship has proven to be crucial to our development as a couple and as individuals. All relationships take work, but when one (or both!) of you deal with regular anxiety, there’s a little bit of extra work you have to put in on a daily basis. Because no one ever said marriage was easy, right? 🙂

Before I dive into the steps that have helped me navigate myanxiety in my current relationship, I want to note that it takes being with the right person for this to be successful. I’m beyond grateful for my patient,understanding and supportive fiancé, Bobby. Love ya, babe!

With that, here are the steps we have taken in order to not let my anxiety and panic takeover our relationship.

  1. Educate yourself and your partner. First thing’s first – educate yourself. I encourage you to learn as much as you can about your anxiety/mental health disorder, including what triggers you and what helps you. Knowledge is power here. I highly recommend therapy, as a professional can definitely guide you in the right direction and help you find some answers. Once you know more, you can communicate your feelings to your significant other and work together on how you can better each other. I ask so many questions in my therapy sessions, and it allows me to understand my reactions and my ways. Also, my therapist recently recommended The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook, and that has taught me even more!
  2. Open up. This is a friendly reminder that you, your anxiety and your emotions are not a burden. These feelings may not be something you feel comfortable sharing early-on in your relationship and that’s totally OK (although, I did tell my fiancé on our first date that I was super needy … Oops?). Regardless when you decide to do so, open up about your emotions and the struggles you face even if they feel like “too much” to you. The right partner will listen and do whatever they are capable of to support and to help you.
  3. Be patient. Figuring this out by yourself takes time and hard work – so, adding in another person into the equation…? Yeah, it ain’t easy. Remember that developing a healthy relationship is a process with ups and downs, as is learning and healing from a mental health disorder. Be patient with yourself, communicate with your significant other regularly, and know that it gets better.
  4. Have some fun! Not everything needs to focus on your symptoms or struggles – don’t forget to have some fun together! Laughter really is the best medicine, especially laughing with someone you love. My fiancé and I go to a new place each year and it’s something that brings us so much joy! Find something you and your partner love (well, besides each other) and make it a priority in your relationship.

Of course, every relationship is different. Some of my past relationships worsened my anxiety (cue all the worrisome questions like, “does he even like me?!”) and some, like my current one, have helped me to progress in my mental health journey.

From my experience, anxiety does not have to make or break your relationship. It can be a catalyst for personal growth as an individual and as a couple, and even strengthen your relationship.

Do you struggle with anxiety or constant worry in your relationship? If so, what have you tried to ease these struggles?



Please note that I am not a mental health professional. Always seek the advice of your mental health professional or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your condition.

[1] https://www.verywellmind.com/generalized-anxiety-disorder-and-relationships-4129126

one of the biggest lessons I learned in 2018

one of the biggest lessons I learned in 2018

how this blog helped me define my passion

When we wake up tomorrow, it’ll be a new year. WHOA.

The end of each year always gets me in my feels as I start to reflect on all of the adventures I’ve taken, all of the obstacles I’ve faced and all of the lessons I’ve learned in the last 365 days. Something I’m really thinking about recently? This blog.

I started the adventures & anxiety blog and Instagram to help with my anxiety through writing, and also in hopes of helpings others. Just a few months in and I’m thinking … Shit, is it making it worse?

Spoiler alert: It did (temporarily).

Unfortunately, I allowed this blog and its corresponding social pages to take priority in my life momentarily … I began to pressure myself to create what I felt was “worthy content” — forcing Instagram posts and blog topics that didn’t necessarily come naturally (something that I promised myself I would NOT do when I started this!). This resulted in spending too much time trying to beat writer’s block and taking too many pictures of myself, which always ends with negative thoughts such as “ugh, bad angle”, “I should seriously consider doing my hair before I take another picture” and “will anyone even care about this?”  *eyeroll*

So yeah, that was totally not the point of starting adventures & anxiety.

As I started to reflect, I quickly took a chapter from my own book and set some boundaries with my Instagram specifically, because damn — I do love that platform. It’s a big part of my career and now an even bigger part of my personal life. But it had started to become all-consuming.

And then … cue Christmastime. Cue added STRESS. Cue anxiety attacks. Cue all the negative feelings about myself. Throw in the pressure I was putting on myself to write and post? NOPE. Formula for disaster.

So, I stepped away from this blog and its social platforms for a total of about two weeks (not that long, but long enough!), and I’m so thankful I did. I learned a few things about myself in the process. And here goes it …

  • Stepping away from the screen allowed me to be more present with the people and experiences I love. I have an amazing family and home, a beautiful baby niece, an expecting sister (and they’re TWINS!), a dog, and of course, a fiancé to focus on and to soak in … Moments with them are what truly matter.
  • This time opened my eyes to my borderline-addiction to social media (I’m definitely going to elaborate on this in a separate blog post soon!). Note: this is something I’m working on.
  • I realized that I needed to re-prioritize my life. Family first – just like my parents taught me!
Processed with VSCO with a6 preset

But, my biggest lesson from this? I LOVE writing – I love writing about mental health, specifically. It fuels me. It makes me feel alive. It makes me feel genuinely like ME. We’re always told to pursue our passion … So, this is me pursuing mine!

And truthfully, I missed it. I missed connecting with like-minded souls. I missed expressing myself through my writing. I missed taking fun pictures and sharing them with my friends, family and followers.

So here I am babes — it feels good to be back!

While I definitely plan to set realistic boundaries with adventures & anxiety, you definitely haven’t seen the last of me. 🙂

What are you reflecting on as the year comes to a close?

Happy 2019!



how to approach new year’s resolutions when you struggle with anxiety

how to approach new year’s resolutions when you struggle with anxiety

no resolutions? no problem.

First thing’s first: HAPPY HOLIDAYS! Christmas is almost here and before we all know it, it’s going to be 2019 (I can’t believe it either!). And with the New Year comes the “new YOU”right? Ugh, wrong. So wrong.

I ditched the typical New Year’s resolutions – aka losing weight and participating in fitness challenges – a couple of years ago. THANK GOODNESS I did, because honestly, those goals did nothing but set me up for disappointment, defeat or feeling like I failed in some way.

Now, I’m all for implementing healthier lifestyle choices; if it helps you to begin those on the first of the year, then go for it! Personally, I have to tread lightly with this all-too-popular trend because let’s be real – if I set a goal and fail at it, I’ll feel nothing but shame toward myself. That’s not a way to start the New Year, now is it?

If you’re anything like me and battle regular anxiety or even high levels of stress, I recommend taking a different approach to your 2019 resolutions intentions. 

Instead of setting goals focused on specific (and sometimes unrealistic) results, I encourage you to set intentions that focus on feelings.

What does that mean, you ask? Well, allow me to elaborate by digging into the three aspirations I plan to work on in the upcoming year.

listen to your body

Instead of calorie counting or following a specific diet, eat what makes you feel good; instead of scheduling five workouts each week, listen to your body and workout when it feels right.

If you’ve read my previous blog on food, you know I’ve learned my lesson from dieting too hard (*cough cough* Whole30). Now, I focus on eating balanced meals that make me feel my best.

Well, I’ve also been known to go a little overboard with my fitness routine in the last decade or so – pushing myself too hard to the point of injury or burnout. But no matter how much I was exercising, I wasn’t seeing any kind of results. Thankfully, I took note from my personal trainer and instead of forcing 5+ workouts in each week, I started to allow myself to rest when my body was tired, super sore or simply if I wasn’t feeling up to it. The benefit? Not only do I feel better physically, my mental health has improved. Win-win!

practice setting boundaries

Boundaries are hard, but damn are they worth setting. Setting boundaries – learning to say no for your own benefit – will do wonders for your overall mental health.

Also, communicating your wants and needs to those closest to you will allow you to express yourself and give your family and friends the opportunity to better understand who you are. Practice setting boundaries with your partner, friends and family members, and focus on feeling less guilty and more at peace with the idea. Read more on how I’m working on this whole boundaries thing here.

prioritize self-care

Don’t wait until January 1 – make it a priority to take care of yourself first right now. Self-care means something different for everyone, but for me it means committing to less with others (hi, boundaries!) and doing more to fuel my needs.

Friendly reminder: self-care is not selfish. So, listen to your thoughts; listen to your body. What do you need? Fulfill those needs and desires – make more time for you.

So, 2019 may not be the year I conquer the keto diet or the year that I run my first marathon (I can barely manage a 5K and I’m totally OK with that!) … But, it will be a year full of mindfulness and self-care – two things I am proud to be working toward.

You don’t need to become a new person in the New Year, but I do recommend putting more effort into listening to your body, being mindful and being happy. What intentions have you set for the upcoming year?

Happy almost-2019!



Please note that I am not a mental health professional. Always seek the advice of your mental health professional or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your condition.

the holiday gift guide for the anxious friend in your life

the holiday gift guide for the anxious friend in your life

I love the holidays, but my goodness the pressure of gift-giving is stressful.

I pride myself on being a good gift-giver, so naturally I put pressure on myself every holiday season to crush the gift game for my family and close friends. In the past, that’d mean spending a ton of money and using my credit card more than I’d like to. As of last year, while I still take pride in my gift-giving skills, I’ve taken a more practical approach and ask myself a few questions before hitting the stores … What does my family need? What will they use and benefit from on a regular basis?

Working for a vitamins and supplements company has definitely changed the Christmas-gift game for my family and friends, as I have easy access to a lot of amazing products (turns out, including probiotics in homemade self-care kits goes over really well!). And while my loved ones definitely appreciate my new holistic style of giving, I also feel good giving them things that they will benefit from and enjoy.

I’m sure many of you are deep into holiday shopping already, but I’m hoping I can still inspire a few! Let’s dig into my favorite products that I use to help balance my emotions and tame my anxiety that I think would make great gifts for anyone struggling with similar symptoms.

Without further ado, these are a few of my favorite things

Brené Brown book(s): I was fortunate to hear Brené Brown speak and meet her at HubSpot’s 2017 INBOUND Marketing Conference – her speech changed my life. Then, I immediately purchased her book Rising Strong and that changed my life all over again. Rising Strong touches on what it takes to get back up after falling down – how owning our stories of disappointment, failure and heartbreak gives us the power to write a new ending. Brené writes that struggle can be our greatest call to courage, and rising strong our clearest path to deeper meaning, wisdom and hope.[1]

I have many, but one of my favorite quotes is:

“The opposite of recognizing that we’re feeling something is denying our emotions. The opposite of being curious is disengaging. When we deny our stories and disengage from tough emotions, they don’t go away; instead, they own us, they define us. Our job is not to deny the story, but to defy the ending—to rise strong, recognize our story, and rumble with the truth until we get to a place where we think, Yes. This is what happened. This is my truth. And I will choose how this story ends.”

I truly believe this book allowed me to see the bigger picture in life, and helped me to dwell less on my problems, and instead own them and move forward. I’ve heard Daring Greatly is amazing, too!

anxiety-busting supplements: What better way to treat your best friends, parents or siblings than with the gift of health? I hit hard on this in one of my first blog posts, but a holistic approach to anxiety disorders definitely makes a positive difference. Also, quality vitamins and supplements can be expensive! I highly recommend a good probiotic for digestion, an adaptogen such as ashwagandha, and a magnesium supplement to help support a good night’s sleep.

skincare for self-care: Daily stressors can add years to your skin through wrinkles, blemishes and dark circles. The stress hormone, cortisol, is known for breaking down collagen, which is bad news for your skin.[2] So, what better way to treat a stressful week than pampering yourself with green beauty products? Pouring a glass of wine while I let a face mask work its magic is one of my favorite evening rituals to relax (my go-to mask is only $19 and the jar lasts forever!).You know that friend who doesn’t make enough time for him or herself? Well, this makes for an affordable, great gift for that person in your life.

essential oils diffuser: While I touched on lavender specifically in a previous post, there are so many essential oils with a variety of health benefits, including stress relief. Scents like frankincense, clary sage and of course lavender = stress relief in the form of aromatherapy. I got my mom a pretty diffuser and an essential oils starter kit last year, and she uses it daily to help her relax! I highly recommend this gift for anyone in the fam. There are a ton of options on Amazon!

herbal tea gift set: Coffee is a trigger for me and for many who struggle with anxiety. Caffeine stimulates your “fight or flight” response, and studies show that this can make anxiety worse and can even trigger an anxiety attack.[3] So, encourage your anxiety-ridden gal pal to try replacing a cup of joe for some herbal tea! My personal favorite is this ginger and turmeric blend. Make it a gift set with a cute mug (because who doesn’t love a good mug?).

Considering anxiety is the most common mental health illness in the U.S., affecting over 18 percent of adults each year[4], I’m hoping at least one of these products will be a fitting gift for a friend or family member in your life! Also, don’t forget to treat yourself to something too. 🙂

Do you have anything to add to this gift guide? I’d love to check some new items out.

Happy holidays!



As many of you know, I work for a vitamins and supplement company, so I’m fortunate to have easy access to some of the products in this blog post. I did discover many of the mentioned items through simple research and/or family and friends. I hope you enjoy!

[1] https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/23317538-rising-strong

[2] https://www.elle.com/beauty/makeup-skin-care/a21270470/how-stress-affects-skin/

[3] https://www.everydayhealth.com/anxiety-pictures/7-surprising-causes-of-anxiety.aspx

[4] https://www.shape.com/lifestyle/mind-and-body/why-you-should-stop-saying-you-have-anxiety-if-you-really-dont

how setting boundaries strengthened my relationships

how setting boundaries strengthened my relationships

Boundaries: a foreign topic to me until the last couple of years. I received a lot of “me, too!” comments and messages from my recent Instagram post about setting boundaries … So, along with the important role boundaries play during the busy holiday season, I’ve decided to expand on the topic here.

Pretty sure I was born a people-pleaser. I am the QUEEN of over-promising and over-committing myself to plans and activities – and most of the time, it’s to make others happy, not myself.

Too many commitments squeezed into my already busy schedule always amounts to added stress. The built-up stress leads to anxiety. The anxiety leads to panic attacks. Oh, and if I cancel or just don’t show up to plans I’ve committed to? The guilt I feel is paralyzing. It’s a vicious cycle, and one that takes its toll on me both physically and mentally.

I stumbled upon a quote that sums up boundaries (or the lack thereof) in my life:

“If you avoid conflict to keep the peace, you start a war inside yourself.” – Cheryl Richardson

The war I create inside myself when I don’t set boundaries not only causes me anxiety, but it also keeps me from developing real, meaningful relationships with myself and with others.

So, what exactly are boundaries?

According to The Center for Stress and Anxiety Management, boundaries help us to define who we are.  They orient us in our relationships,and signify to us and to others where “I end and you begin”.[1]

To me, setting boundaries simply means knowing my limits a.k.a. learning to say “no” to others, to plans, to activities, to anything, in order to benefit myself and my ability to develop meaningful relationships with others.

Now, boundaries can be physical, emotional, spiritual, etc., but I’m specifically talking about setting boundaries with others when it comes to commitment.

While I’m still a newbie to this, here’s how I set boundaries:

  1. Assess the situation – Instead of automatically agreeing, asking … Does this fit in my schedule? Is this something I want to do/attend?
  2. Ask myself what is best for me – Will this stress me out? I need to be aware of and respect my personal limits.
  3. Make a decision.
  4. Communicate my decision with emphasis on WHY I made it to the other person/group – honesty is key here!
  5. Move forward guilt-free.

I just made it sound easy, but this process takes time and effort. For me, the most important step I need to practice and put effort into is No. 4: communication.

Before learning about the importance of boundaries, I used to come up with not-exactly-true reasons why I couldn’t be somewhere for someone. For example, I’d say, “I don’t feel well. I’m out for tonight.” While that was kind of true (considering the guilt from bailing usually made me sick to my stomach), it often wasn’t the real reason.

With the help of therapy, I’ve learned that openness and honesty are key. Instead of making something up, I now do my best to speak the truth and communicate that to my family and friends. So, instead of “feeling sick” I’ll say, “I’m committed to another event tonight, so I’m unable to make this one,” OR “I’m worn out from the work week and am going to take some time to relax. Let’s reschedule for another time!

I communicate this in a calm and respectful manner, of course. And more often than not, my family and friends understand (if they don’t, then that’s a reason to assess that specific relationship in my life).

The hardest part in all of this for me? Learning that taking care of myself is NOT selfish.

Taking care of myself first allows me to be more present in life, and that alone benefits my relationships. It opens the line of communication, allows me to be 100 percent honest and 100 percent myself … Not only have I learned more about myself in this process, others have, too.

I truly believe that boundaries are essential to real, meaningful relationships.

You must set boundaries in your closest relationships so that you can feel accepted, heard and loved … Part of feeling connected to someone is allowing him or her to truly see youand what you’re all about.[2]

Boundaries have helped me to understand what true self-care is, how to love myself, and how to respect the boundaries that others need, too.

Now, I am still a serious work in progress over here – setting boundaries takes effort and does not happen overnight! I’m making it a priority to practice boundaries daily and it has benefitted me SO much so far. It’s helped me to stay true to myself and to the people in my life.

Do you struggle with setting boundaries? How do you plan to implement boundaries into your life, especially during the busy holiday season?



Please note that I am not a mental health professional. Always seek the advice of your mental health professional or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your condition.

[1] https://www.csamsandiego.com/blog/2016/7/6/the-importance-of-boundaries

[2] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/your-emotional-meter/201705/when-guilt-keeps-you-setting-boundaries